A pox on you – a pox on all your houses (relationships)

I’m still unsure abouthow Dom has enlisted the help of the dark arts or perhaps even voodoo magic, but something very strange is happening in this office.

The Hiatt Curse –so it hasbeen named – seems to have played havoc with the hearts of every Rhizome employee. Now, in an office full of attractive, fun and interesting media gurus (not that anyone has ever actually referred to us in this way), there is not a single person that isn’t single. In fact, there has been a significant amount of ‘conscious uncoupling’ in the past few months.

Except for Mr Hiatt, who is happily married to someone considerably out of his league.

Don’t get me wrong, The Hiatt Curse cannot be blamed entirely for the lack of relationships in the office – there are some die hard singletons who joined Rhizome single… and will probably leave it in the exact same way. But dear Pigeon* in the corner is definitely doing something mischievous to ensure he is surrounded by heartbroken young fillies.

However, despite his best efforts, the barrel chested lothario** has not dampened spirits or faith in ‘true’ love. The office is now a hot bed for tales of hilarious dates and we are all suffering with RSI from swiping left or (more often than not if you’re hedge-your-bets Stevens), swiping right.

When questioned on the matter, Mr Hiatt commented: “It’s because all you girls secretly desire me and me alone. Undeniably it’s affecting you all emotionally.”

If anyone has any better suggestions – other than voodoo, witchcraft or uncontrollable desire for Dom – please feel free to get in touch. We are available to discuss over cocktails or dinner most weeknights (provided we aren’t busy ruling out all the unsuitables on Tinder).